Okay so people kept asking for history stuff that doesn’t put you to sleep, right? Saw some fancy documentaries talking about Roman emperors being wild, and Caligula’s name always popped up. Figured, why not try making his story actually easy to digest? Started with the title: “Caligula biography simplified. (Quick read for all readers)“. Frankly, that was the easy bit.
First step: actually understanding the dude myself. Grabbed a couple of those thick history books. Man, talk about a headache. Every author seemed to argue, or used words longer than my arm. Seriously, needed a dictionary just for the introduction sometimes. Flipped through pages feeling totally lost. Ummed and ahhed for ages. Was about to throw the books across the room. Then I remembered the point: simplify it. Duh.
So, I ditched the academic stuff for a minute. Just sat down with a blank page and asked: “Okay, what’s the absolute core everyone needs to know about this guy?” Jotted down bullet points like a madman:
- His weird nickname (Little Boots! Seriously!)
- Started kinda okay? Then went full-on bonkers?
- The crazy rumors (Horse consul? Bridge of boats? Probably exaggerated but wild)
- How it ended (Spoiler: Not well for him)
Realized a big problem fast: historians argue loads about what’s true and what’s just nasty gossip spread by his enemies. Like, was he actually insane, or just a massive jerk playing power games? Felt myself getting tangled in the “maybes” and “perhaps”. Had to slap myself mentally: “Keep it simple, stupid! Quick read, remember?” Decided to stick to the most repeated stuff, the general picture everyone sort of agrees on, while adding a little note like “Historians debate this stuff, but this is the common story”.
Writing started rough. First draft sounded like a boring school report. Ugh. Tried again, this time pretending I was just telling my buddy this crazy story over a coffee. Cut out all the fancy dates and Latin terms. Focused on the man, the madness (or alleged madness!), the power trip, the bloody ending. Made the sentences short. Chopped big paragraphs into bites.
The biggest challenge? Balancing “simple” with “not stupid”. Didn’t want to dumb it down so much it became meaningless. Like saying “he got murdered” is simple, but why did he get murdered? Because everyone finally had enough of his nonsense! That connection matters. Tried to weave that cause and effect in there simply: “He kept making enemies, treating people like dirt, and finally… they stabbed him.”
Read it back. Then read it again. Tweaked sentences, swapped words for simpler ones, checked the flow. Asked myself: “Would I actually want to read this if I knew nothing?” Finally, yeah, it felt kinda right. Had that “quick read” vibe – clear, fast-moving, sticking to the wild highlights without vanishing down historical rabbit holes. Covered the basics: who he was, how he became boss, the wild stuff he supposedly did, how it ended. Done.
Phew. So yeah, that was my Sunday wrestling with Roman history. Key takeaways?
- History books can be thick enough to stop a door.
- Cutting out the academic noise is harder than it looks.
- Simplifying ain’t about making it dumb, it’s about making the core story shine through, fast.
